I feel like writing has become tedious.  It’s the same thing over and over. 

Sometimes I feel like the only reason I haven’t gone back to him this time is because people know. People would judge be.

I woke up feeling strong and calm and ready. But my day beat me down.

My boss was on my head again today. I feel like I’m his target this week. 

Im trying to get back to that strong place but I just don’t feel it anymore.  I just want to go back to my room, curl into a ball and sleep.

I don’t like myself much right now. I kissed Darcy which was a stupid stupid thing. Somewhere my day just went wrong. And when it went wrong I just wanted to tell my ex.  I just wanted him to hold me.

I hate this place.  I need a new job. I can’t even take my boss on cos he’s right.  I was just his target this week. 

I should be excited that it’s finally the weekend but I’m not.

I’m not strong enough to get through this moment.   I’m not. And I can’t pretend to be anymore. 


3 thoughts on “Circles

  1. You can make it through. I also have lost the ability to deal with my job that I’m totally fed up. I feel your pain. At least if you want to lay in your bed all day, you won’t have to go to work!


  2. Maybe thinking people would judge you for going back to him right now is some good added incentive. I can appreciate that sometimes my friends holding me accountable when I feel otherwise weak is what gets me through. Whatever gets you through. Without going back to him, of course.


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