Omw. I feel high. And light. I feel like i can get through this. I feel confident again. And amazing.
Went to see a therapist. Well two. It was a strange experience. The couple sits with you together. They made me coffee and provided snacks and gave me a blanket. It was from 8pm to 10pm.
They connected things that I’d never connected. Explained things. Gave me a plan to move forward.
I felt high afterwards. It was a 40 min drive there and back but I loved it.
Driving home, looking at the bright yellow full moon, I felt whole again. I felt like me again. I still cried a little there and back… But it felt like I was moving forward again.
I have a plan now. I have a path.
They explained things to me. I’ve been to many shrinks and for the first time, my cutting was broken down into why I do it. Normally I’d mention it and it was just never mentioned. My kinesiologist said it was the devil lol.
But they explained it to me. I knew I cut myself because I was in pain. But apparently the pain creates and aggression and because I’m soft I don’t take this aggression out on others. I take it out on myself.