Falling apart

When things crumble it all goes together…

My roommate moving out is taking its toll on me. For two days I won’t have a fridge and I’m asking random people to keep stuff in their fridges for me.

I also have to take my cat somewhere so he doesn’t run out or get traumatised by the chaos of the move. And I need someone to take him from tonight.

Then there’s moving the fridge in. I’m asking random people with big cars to help me bring the fridge. I don’t know how I’m going to carry it up yet. I phoned bakkie services and they all turned me down because it’s a small job.

I keep telling myself I can handle whatever comes on my own. I can get through anything.  But I really don’t want to.

When my mom phoned to talk about the funeral yesterday, I really struggled not to start sobbing.

I’m behind at work, I’m insanely stressed, I have a upper respiratory infection and am struggling to breathe and I’m extremely emotional. I almost broke down three times. I almost called my ex and asked him to sort it all out for me. Cos he has access to people. To friends and family. 

It is strange how when things fall apart, random people turn up to help you put it all together again. It’s never the people you expect. It’s almost never the people you’d want it to be.

But somehow help is sent.

Right now I’m just praying for help to get through this week. To get through this month. And for things to work out with my new job and my move and finding a new tenant.

When it rains, it pours.


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